Ok. Of course it always works this way....I spend hours, days, and weeks trying to get this to work...then within minutes after I post the question I figure it out...sigh....
the problem was, the S9 wasn't staying in pairing/discovery mode because my phone was on and it was connecting to the phone. So by the time Windows would try to find it, the S9 was out of Pairing mode.
1. The download from the Lenovo site worked to update to the Enhanced data Rate
2. You need to have all other devices that the S9 would pair with turned off so the S9 stays in pairing mode while Windows is looking for it.